2010 World Cup, go Malaysia!

Last night, all of a sudden, in the wake of German's masterclass mauling of Argentina, my wife asked me with a very serious face, "why do you support France?"

As usual, as a person who ALWAYS have a reason (or a scapegoat) for almost anything (yes, I know, I need help), I would like to share my reasons.

And please, ready yourself for the most deep rooted thought process rationalization. Hopefully, it could even help most people out there who are still walking in circles feeling lost, to finally choose a team to support for World Cup.

As a person who comes from a footballing nation that excels in village tournaments, I have the privilege to choose any country to support. And since my fellow countrymen who are directly involved in the World Cup are confined to just being the fourth officials, I can even change the teams I'm supporting during play.

But on every World Cup, I always start. by supporting France. Ask me who I'd support for 2014 World Cup... France of course. I'll tell you why later.

Typically, ladies chose which team to support by analyzing which football player appears in the People magazine most often. Players who are dating celebrities would add more weight to this already heavy analytical brain activities, that sometimes need to be hasten as it occupies the processing power of the brain to think about how to lose weight, while chomping off biscuits over coffee.

Generally speaking, of course. For me, I'm just happy that my lovely wife just stopped at "Why France?" and not continue with, "Is it because of Beckham?".

I'm not going to say I like France because of their passing game, their flair or showmanship of skills. Because in fairness, a lot of other teams do that too; Chile, Brazil, Argentina, Spain etc.

I chose France because of the country itself. It's policies on world peace and environment are exemplary. They are good friends of the West and East. They are friends of the Muslim world despite being a stronghold nation for Christianity. On top of that, my name has a close similarity to the Eiffel tower.

I'd not support Serbia because of their genocide stunt.

I'd support Chile, Brazil and Argentina because on top of their beautiful game, they party so much that they don't have time to cause nuisance to the world.

I don't support England because I have already spent so much on merchandise and satellite TV for the English Primier League. But as a nation, I hate it when they second US for war stuff. I can't think of anything that ties England with peace. Think Gandhi, Apartheid, Ireland, Mad Cow Disease and Frankie Goes To Hollywood. I can never support England knowing the damage they have caused my country. Their divide-and-conquer policy was solely responsible for the nation's imbalance and racism to this very day. But in recent time, I'm not so fond of them being USA's cheerleader for destruction.

But I'd support USA.

I love that country. The people (minus the rednecks) are great. Most of all, I love Apple, McDonalds, Facebook and Hooters. And the fact that, few hundred years ago, someone pulled a practical joke on them by giving them the book of 'Football 101' upside down, where even to this very day, they still play foot-ball with their hands, USA have come a long way to finally resist the temptation to wear make-up and tights and catch the ball with their hands and run towards the goal in tights. Have I mentioned that they actually wear tights? Actually, for that alone, I'd support USA.

I support Netherlands because the Dutch Lady chick gave me a lot of happy times when I was a spud.

I definitely support German for their massive use of the letter Z. This letter has been underutilized and ignored in almost all language. This shows that they are a caring country.

I can go on... but I think I should stop now. And I also I think I have to stop eating funny looking mushrooms.

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